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· Just hanging brain.
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2,692 Posts
Discussion Starter · #1 ·
I don't even know what to think about this! Is this psychological? Is it parental failure? WTF!! And threatening the other students with punishment if they didn't just accept it is outrageous!

Boy, 12, turns into girl | The Sun |News

By BRIAN FLYNN
and VIRGINIA WHEELER

Published: Today
A BOY aged 12 turned up at school as a GIRL - after changing sex during the summer holidays.
Teachers called an emergency assembly to order fellow pupils to treat him as female.


The lad, whose parents have changed his name to a girl's by deed poll, arrived in a dress with long hair in ribboned pigtails. He is preparing for sex-swap surgery.

Angry parents told yesterday how their kids were left tearful and confused after school staff announced the boy pupil was now a girl.

They said the head teacher should have informed them in advance of the "sex change" so they could prepare their sons and daughters and inform them about gender issues.

They added that the school's failure to do so had left the boy to suffer cruel taunts and bullying.

One mum said: "They behaved appallingly by throwing this hand grenade into the room and then leaving the inevitable questions about it for unprepared parents.

"Maybe we could have explained sexual politics and encouraged our kids to be more sensitive if we'd had a chance to be involved."

Over the summer holidays his parents changed his name to a female one by deed poll. He is preparing to undergo hormone treatment and surgery - and could become the world's youngest sex-swap patient in the coming years.

The Sun knows his identity but will not reveal it. His mother told us last night: "We are committed to ensuring the very best for our child. We are working with other agencies to ensure our child's welfare is protected."

The 1,000-pupil school, in southern England, has given the lad a separate toilet and changing room in the sports hall.

It is understood he hoped his transformation would go unnoticed as he was starting secondary education and children stepping up from other primary schools would not recognise him.

But his former classmates at primary level DID spot the difference - and quickly spread the word.

The boy, who for years has told pals he yearns to be a girl, had to endure spiteful jibes and was asked by some kids: "Are you gay?"

Teachers stepped in with the emergency assembly, at which pupils were threatened with tough disciplinary action if they failed to treat him as a girl or use his new name. Some bewildered youngsters burst into tears.


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The mum, whose daughter was a classmate of the lad at primary school, said: "She told me the pupil is already a target for bullying.

"And what has really upset the parents is that the school didn't see fit to send us a letter first so we could explain it to our children in our own way.

"Parents surely have a right to know when their children are being confronted with such sensitive issues as gender realignment at such a young age.

"They were simply told, 'You may notice one pupil is not present in this assembly - that is because the pupil is now a girl.'

"Kids are by nature immature and insensitive. It is not fair either for the child who is undergoing this change. The girl, as she now is, will go through hell because of how this has been handled."

The lad was absent from school yesterday because of the taunts.

His family, who live on a council estate, have received threats and are under police protection.

It is understood the head at his primary school insisted he was treated as a boy - and used male toilets - despite his frequent "girlie" behaviour.

He wore a bikini instead of trunks at swimming lessons, dried himself on Barbie towels, rode a pink scooter to school and wore pink ribbons in his hair.

But a source at the secondary school, who referred to the pupil in both genders, said: "His parents have accepted he has now chosen to be a girl, and that's how he will be. She has not come into school since the assembly. There were things that went on in the community which have been extremely upsetting for the family.

"It was a knock-on effect from what was said in school. So they can't let her come in for her own safety. We have no idea exactly when she will be coming back, but she WILL be back."

Transgender counsellor David Hawley last night paid tribute to the pupil's "strength of character".

He said: "It is very unusual for a child of that age to be that clear about what they want to do. She has had a lot of support from her parents. So I imagine she was comfortable with herself before going to school and now she is discovering it can be a nasty world, which is hard at that age."

Psychotherapist James Caspian said the child would not be allowed hormone treatment in the UK until passing puberty. Meanwhile he and the other kids would have to cope with the shockwaves caused by the switch.

Mr Caspian said: "These children are old enough to have picked up a lot of taboos from society."

German Kim Petras - born Tim - became the world's youngest transsexual at 16 earlier this year.
And why should all the other parents be expected to discuss "sexual politics" with their kids? When I was 12 the only political matter I had to worry about was whether or not I could play on the Mayor McCheese toy at McDonalds.
 

· Prickly Pear
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7,632 Posts
If parents taught their kids that other people should be accepted for who they are this wouldn't be an issue. Unfortunately, most people are close-minded pricks. Furthermore, kids are some of the cruelest creatures on this planet so laying out the consequences for mistreatment of the kid makes perfect sense.

Lastly, it's rare that gender reassignment is done this early, but it does happen.
 

· Just hanging brain.
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Discussion Starter · #3 ·
If parents taught their kids that other people should be accepted for who they are this wouldn't be an issue. Unfortunately, most people are close-minded pricks. Furthermore, kids are some of the cruelest creatures on this planet so laying out the consequences for mistreatment of the kid makes perfect sense.

Lastly, it's rare that gender reassignment is done this early, but it does happen.
Fair points. But why does a 12 year old need a sex change in the first place? I know kids are growing up faster these days than my generation, but how can a 12 year old properly understand the impact this would have on his life?
 

· A guy on a scruffy bike
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15,372 Posts
I don't even know what to think about this! Is this psychological? Is it parental failure? WTF!! And threatening the other students with punishment if they didn't just accept it is outrageous!

And why should all the other parents be expected to discuss "sexual politics" with their kids? When I was 12 the only political matter I had to worry about was whether or not I could play on the Mayor McCheese toy at McDonalds.
For a change like this, the parents should have changed schools entirely and just let her have a fresh start. If not, then yes they should have discussed it with the school administration, so that it could be handled and the kid given appropriate protection and support of/when needed. This was poorly handled.

Fair points. But why does a 12 year old need a sex change in the first place? I know kids are growing up faster these days than my generation, but how can a 12 year old properly understand the impact this would have on his life?
Clearly the kid has always felt female. So that's all the "impact on his life" he really needs to understand. Some people are straight; some are gay; some are transgender. This seems to have a very strong genetic component, meaning that you can't "train" them out of it any more than you can really "train" a left-handed person to be right-handed. They used to try to do that, too, and eventually figured out it caused the kids a lot of problems, some of which persisted throughout life, and that it was better to just let left-handed people be left-handed.

PhilB
 

· Prickly Pear
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They love their kid and want the best. Believe it or not, transgenderism, for lack of the correct term, is real. I wouldn't wish it on my worst enemy, but it's real.
 

· second chimp in space
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For a change like this, the parents should have changed schools entirely and just let her have a fresh start. If not, then yes they should have discussed it with the school administration, so that it could be handled and the kid given appropriate protection and support of/when needed. This was poorly handled.
They said it happened the summer before starting secondary school, which appears to be a mix of middle and high school in the US. Secondary education - Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia

The problem was that kids that used to know him in primary school recognized her. The only way to get around this is to move to a different city.
But yes, the school should have been notified and the teachers should be aware of it.
 

· A guy on a scruffy bike
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15,372 Posts
WTF is up with the parents that they would allow this?
I'd be more inclined to ask "WTF is up with the parents if they wouldn't allow this?", although more often than not the answer would be all too obvious. Sad to say, if the parents had refused to allow her her identity, it would have been considered "normal" and there would have been no story.

They said it happened the summer before starting secondary school, which appears to be a mix of middle and high school in the US. Secondary education - Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia

The problem was that kids that used to know him in primary school recognized her. The only way to get around this is to move to a different city.
But yes, the school should have been notified and the teachers should be aware of it.
Then they should have considered moving to a different city, or getting special permission to transfer her to another nearby school district, or putting her in a private school. Any of those would have made her transition far less painful.

PhilB
 

· Registered
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He/she/it/whatever the fuck it is, is going to have a hard life. For the parents to allow this at 12 years old, is absurd. Transgender at 12? Shitty parenting. There are going to be psychological problems for it's (yeah, IT) entire life.


What the fuck is the world coming to?
 

· A guy on a scruffy bike
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15,372 Posts
He/she/it/whatever the fuck it is, is going to have a hard life. For the parents to allow this at 12 years old, is absurd. Transgender at 12? Shitty parenting. There are going to be psychological problems for it's (yeah, IT) entire life.

What the fuck is the world coming to?
I think it is likely that many, if not most, of the problems she does have will be somehow related to contact with people who have attitudes such as this.

HOPEFULLY, what the fuck this world is coming to is a world in which this sort of hateful prejudice is no longer acceptable to express in public.

PhilB
 

· Prickly Pear
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Examples?
One example

There is another case of a boy even younger who had severe behavioral problems until his parents allowed him to dress and identify as a girl. I can't find a link to the case right now but there was an excellent piece on it on NPR a year back or so. Once he was allowed to identify as female his behavioral problems (violent outbursts, temper, depression) all abated.
 

· Just hanging brain.
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Discussion Starter · #15 · (Edited)
The thing is though, no matter how badly they want(ed) to be a girl, they are not girls! They dress like girls, they act like girls, they had their dicks removed/rebuilt to imitate labia, and someday they may even get fake boobs. But its still all fake. Their genetic makeup is still male. They just wear the most expensive, elaborate, and permanent disguise money can buy. But they're still not girls, they're transgendered-males!

:edit However, I agree with the views that they shouldn't be abused, ostracised, beaten, etc. I just think someone along the line should tell them that they'll get close, but will never actually become what they want, and make sure they can live with being stuck in between male and female for the rest of their lives.
 

· Registered
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The thing is though, no matter how badly they want(ed) to be a girl, they are not girls! They dress like girls, they act like girls, they had their dicks removed/rebuilt to imitate labia, and someday they may even get fake boobs. But its still all fake. Their genetic makeup is still male. They just wear the most expensive, elaborate, and permanent disguise money can buy. But they're still not girls, they're transgendered-males!
So? What should it matter to you?

I don't think they are old enough to make that decision, but whether or not they are actually females or living as them have nothing to do with my life or yours.
 

· Cheshire Cat
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1,025 Posts
To turn to science, wouldn't the gender reassignment and all of the surgery, hormones, whatever else goes with it have to be constantly tailored while the kid goes through puberty, since I assume it won't develop like it all should.
 

· Prickly Pear
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The thing is though, no matter how badly they want(ed) to be a girl, they are not girls! They dress like girls, they act like girls, they had their dicks removed/rebuilt to imitate labia, and someday they may even get fake boobs. But its still all fake. Their genetic makeup is still male. They just wear the most expensive, elaborate, and permanent disguise money can buy. But they're still not girls, they're transgendered-males!

:edit However, I agree with the views that they shouldn't be abused, ostracised, beaten, etc. I just think someone along the line should tell them that they'll get close, but will never actually become what they want, and make sure they can live with being stuck in between male and female for the rest of their lives.
A: So what?
B: Do you honestly think transgenders aren't aware of this?
 

· Silent pipes take lives
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Gender reassignment (for male-to-female), if it is to be done, should be done as early as possible--before male hormones have a chance to deepen the voice and make other changes.
 

· Just hanging brain.
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Discussion Starter · #20 · (Edited)
So? What should it matter to you?

I don't think they are old enough to make that decision, but whether or not they are actually females or living as them have nothing to do with my life or yours.
A: So what?
B: Do you honestly think transgenders aren't aware of this?
Geez, give a guy a break for posting an early AM/pre-Monster rant! FWIW, I really don't care what people do to themselves. I just question the people who are approving these drastic and non-medically-essential medical procedures to such young kids. And I question the parents because one way or another they are responsible for what happens to their kids medically, socially, and psychologically. They shouldn't expect the school to hold an assembly to introduce their new "daughter" for them, then wonder why 400 other 12 year olds go "WTF, I don't get it, that's really wierd. Hey, why are you so wierd?"
 
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