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Valiant Poultry
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This is a joke, it is just a joke, please don't harass me about the fact that it has some racial things in it.



A black guy, a Mexican guy, and a white guy are walking down the beach. They come across a lamp, and they pick it up. One of them grabs it from the other, and in the process of doing this, a genie pops out of the lamp.

The genie says, "Thank you all for freeing me!!! For your help, I will grant you each one wish!!!"

The genie looks at the black guy and says, "I'll start with you, my dark skinned friend!!"

The black guy thinks for a second, then says "I wish that me, and all of my fellow black people, were all happy and back in Africa!!!"

**POOF**

The black guy is gone.

The genie then says to the Mexican guy, "And what do you desire, my bronze skinned friend??"

The Mexican guy quickly replies, "I wish that me, and all of my Hispanic people were back home in Mexico!!!"

**POOF**

The Mexican guy is gone.

The genie then says to the white guy, "And last but not least, what do you desire my light skinned friend??"

The white guy quickly replies, "Okay, so genie, you mean to tell me that all of the blacks are back in Africa, and all of the Hispanics are back in Mexico???"

"That is correct," replies the genie.

The white guy looks at him, smiles, and says "Shit, in that case, I'll just have a Coke..."
 

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Valiant Poultry
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Discussion Starter #2
And another one.


A black guy is walking down the street kicking rubbish out of his way when he sees something gleaming. He picks it up and it's a strange kind of lamp, out of which a Jewish genie emerges.

The Jewish genie says "I will grant you two wishes for freeing me!!"

The black guy says "No shit?? First I want to be white, up tight, and doing alright!!! And after that, I want to be surrounded by pussy!!!"

**POOF**

The Jewish genie turns him into a tampon.


Moral of this story?? You can't get anything from a Jew without strings attached.
 

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Valiant Poultry
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Discussion Starter #3
What are the 4 shortest books in the world??

"Polish Wit and Wisdom"
"Jewish Business Ethics"
"Italian War Heroes"
and
"Black People I've Met While Yachting"
 

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Valiant Poultry
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Discussion Starter #4
Don't forget folks, these are all just jokes I've heard...not meant to hurt anyones feelings...
 

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yes yes, i laughed even BEFORE i heard it in the boondock saints.

i'm sure this thread won't last long...but here's my submission

do you know what a jewish dilemma is?

free ham.





another you say? well ok!!!

how did the puerto rican woman know that her daughter was having her period?

she could taste the blood on her son's penis.




oh no! okay...one more...

i was walking in the park one bright sunny sunday afternoon, when I noticed a cute little girl out walking her dog. as she approached me on the path, she looked about 9 years old, all dressed up in her sunday best, and her freshly scrubbed face, just gleaming with cutsiness. tugging on her leash was a well groomed terrier.

aAs we met on the path, iI greeted her, "hi there, my, aren't you pretty today and what a fine looking dog you have."

"thank you, sir" she said, "and what a nice day this is isn't it?"

"yes it is" I answered, "my, what a polite little girl you are, and what a pretty dress you're wearing."

"oh, thank you, sir. my mother taught me to always be polite and she made this dress for me, isn't it pretty?" she said with a beaming smile.

"yes, very pretty" I answered, "by the way, what's your dog's name?"

"oh, sir, my dog's name is 'porky', isn't that cute?"

"well, it certainly is an unusual name for a dog. why do you call him 'Porky'?"

"because he fucks pigs!"
 

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the pope calls his mother right after being elected pope.

pope: hi mom, i've got some good news and some bad news.

mom: what's the good news?

pope: i've just been elected pPope.

mom: what's the bad news?

pope: i have to move into an italian neighborhood.
 

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little martin is eight years old. one day while he was pestering his mother, she said, "why don't you go across the street and watch the builders work, maybe you will learn something."

martin was gone about two hours, when he came home, his mother asked him what he had learned. martin replied - "well first you put the goddamn door up. then the son of a bitch doesn't fit so you have to take the cock sucker down. then you have to shave a cunt hair off each side and put the mother fucker back up."

martin's mother said, "wait until your father gets home."

when martin's father got home, martin's mom told him to ask martin what he had learned today. when martin told him the whole story, dad said, "martin, go outside and get me a switch." martin replied, "get fucked. that's the electrician's job."
 

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this pole got married, but he was too dumb to know what to do on his wedding night.

"for god's sake, stan," said his bride, "you take that thing you play with and you put it where I pee."

so he got up and threw his bowling ball in the sink.
 

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a black guy and a gorilla go into a bar together. he says to the bartender, "i'd like a beer, and a gin and tonic for my girlfriend here."

the bartender says, "oh come on, pal, we don't serve no gorillas in here."

so the guy figures he'll fix them, he takes the gorilla home, shaves off all her hair, gives her a nice wig, lipstick, red dress, etc. he takes her back to the bar and says, "i'd like a beer, and a gin and tonic for my girlfriend here."

the bartender gives them the drinks and they go off and sit down and chat. The bartender turns to his buddy at the bar and says, "you know, that drives me crazy, it seems like every time a good looking italian girl comes in here, she's with a black guy."
 

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Valiant Poultry
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Discussion Starter #12
Bowling ball in the sink...that's great, my polish friend at work will like that one!!!
 

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mark hoffman (a well known weirdo in arizona) was sent to prison and placed in a cell with a huge, burly guy. when lights-out occurred, the big guy got out of his bunk and said to hoffman, "we're going to have sex! you want to be the mommie or the daddie?"

a very terrified hoffman replied,"uh, well, I guess i'll be the daddie."

then the burley guy said, "ok then, get down here and suck momma's dick!"
 

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q: how do you tell if an arkansas girl is old enough to marry?

a: make her stand in a barrel. if her chin is over the top, she's old enough. if it isn't, cut the barrel down a bit.


q: why wasn't jesus born in belgium?

a: god couldn't find three wise men in belgium.
 

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Valiant Poultry
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Discussion Starter #16
dude, where are you getting these from Derek?
 

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site called rhf


a scotsman and a jew went to a restaurant. after a hearty meal, the waitress came by with the inevitable check. to the amazement of all, the scotsman was heard to say, "i'll pay it!" and he actually did.

the next morning's newspaper carried the news item:

"JEWISH VENTRILOQUIST FOUND MURDERED IN BLIND ALLEY."
 

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Valiant Poultry
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Discussion Starter #18
I've read alot of those in the good ol' "Ballrub's Joke Thread." Those were the days man...then that shit started to suck.
 

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a girl is watching her father shower. she points to his penis and says, "daddy, when will I get one of those?" he looks at his watch and says, "in about 10minutes...when your mother leaves for work!"
 

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i never really got into the joke threads that ballrub put up...don't know why..i guess its because i don't like to waste my time with jokes that may not be offensive...i don't wanna read through 4208575044 jokes about gheyness just to get to a good one about poles or mezicans and stuff.
 
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