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· I ♥ ♀
2,763 Posts
Discussion Starter · #1 · (Edited)
Some you may have heard, some you may not. Still worth the post.

What do you call two Mexicans playing basketball?
>>Juan on Juan.

What is a Yankee?
>>The same thing as a quickie, but a guy can do it alone.

What is the difference between a Harley and a Hoover?
>>The position of the dirt bag.

Why is divorce so expensive?
>>Because it's worth it.

What is the fluid capacity of Monica Lewinsky's mouth?
>>One U.S. leader.

What do you see when the Pilsbury Dough Boy bends over?

Why is air alot like sex?
>>Because it's no big deal unless you're not getting any.

Why is Chelsea Clinton so homely?
>>Because Janet Reno is her real father.

What do you get when you put 50 lesbians and 50 politicians in a room together?
>>100 people who don't do dick.

What do you call a smart blonde?
>>A golden retriever.

What do attorneys use for birth control?
>>Their personalities.

What's the difference between a girlfriend and a wife?
>>45 lbs.

What's the difference between a boyfriend and a husband?
>>45 minutes.

How many women does it take to change a light bulb?
>>None, they just sit there in the dark and bitch.

Why do men want to marry virgins?
>>They can't take criticism.

Why is it so hard for women for find men that are Sensitive, caring, and good looking?
>>Because those men already have boyfriends.

What's the difference between a new husband and a new dog?
>>After a year, the dog is still excited to see you.

What makes men chase women they have no intention of marrying?
>>The same urge that makes dogs chase cars they have no intention of driving.

What did the blonde say when she found out she waspregnant?
>>"Are you sure its mine?"

What's the difference between Beer Nutsand Deer Nuts?
>>Beer nuts are $1, and Deer Nuts are always under a buck.

Why does Mike Tyson cry during sex?
>>Mace will do that to you.

Why did O.J. Simpson want to move to West Virginia?
>>Everyone has the same DNA.

Why do men find it difficult to make eye contact?
>>Breast don't have eyes.

What's the Cuban National Anthem?
>>Row, Row, Row Your Boat"

Where does an Irish family go on vacation?
>>A different bar.

· Registered
443 Posts
I'd pick a fav but theyre all purty funny. Nice post
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