Should paternity be tested at birth?

[AnKleBiTer]

This is a hot topic. It is perfectly feasible to expect a child born to your partner to be your own but I know that is not always the case.

As someone else stated earlier...did she know with certainty that he/Richard was not the father? And...if there was a possibility of him not being the father shouldn't she have told him that a long time ago?

There are also the cases where the father doesn't want to lose his right to a child born into his marriage. What happens in those cases? It's a catch-22 situation no matter what!

I also agree it is unfair to "Richard" but in the same token it is unfair to the child. As I said earlier it is always the child that suffers in the end.

[Fusternc]

I am for paternity tests on every child born. Too many cases of women deceiving men. But if this isn't possible the father can have a "motherless paternity test" performed. This is performed by contacting any genetics lab that performs such services and collecting cheek cells from only the father and the baby/child. This can then be sent in and tested in total secrecy if desired. No mention need ever be made to the mother. If its your child, your golden, if not then time to have a little talk with the mother. ;)

[sonix]

an interesting case, I think I agree with mandatory paternity tests at birth, it keeps from having hurt feelings of a faithful wife being questioned by a nervous husband, reasures the jealous man, and, if it comes back that it isn't his child, it can avoid him being lied to, and made to pay for a child that isn't his. It is sad that the level of infidelity is so high that this is needed, but with the current child support laws screwing over fathers so badly, I feel it is necessary.

[hybrid]

Originally Posted by jiandersen76

If you need a paternity test at the time of delivery to answer any questions you may have, you shouldn't be married in the first place.

I like the fact that this prick raises the child for 3 years (before the divorce) then walks away and does not want to support him/her. Must be a heartless bastard to turn his back on the child that knows only him as dad.

Paternity does not constitute fatherhood.

Thats the most fucking ignorant thing I have ever heard.

Did you read what he is paying a month? $1200 is a lot of fucking money for a child that you didnt spawn. I dont remember reading that he wanted to adopt some children.

Fatherhood isnt about financial responsability. Its about playing a positive male role in the life of a child. He may decide that he wants to continue the relationship with the child but ultimately its really up to him.

He should only be obligated to be financialy responsibly for a child concieved of his DNA.

Anything else tells me that women can be whores..........do everything they can to keep it on the "DL" and after the time limit is over.......they get the free ride.

Its already bad enough that when people get divorced the father usually gets raped for child support. They dont care that he has to live in a studio apt while the ex lives in the home and gets the money.

All you do by going with this law is make an already hard world for divorced men, much more difficult.

Its hard enough to trust people as it is and to make it so that you can be fucked no matter what..........

[BusaDave]

Originally Posted by hybrid

Anything else tells me that women can be whores..........do everything they can to keep it on the "DL" and after the time limit is over.......they get the free ride.

Hmmm...

...aren't there MEN involved in your scenario?

Its already bad enough that when people get divorced the father usually gets raped for child support. They dont care that he has to live in a studio apt while the ex lives in the home and gets the money.

That view is a bit myopic, and appears on the surface to be a bit sexist in that you seem to be totally discounting the contribution of womens' roles in nurturing children. That aside, the issue is that the laws are focused (or should be focused) on what's best for the CHILDREN in these situations. There will be no perfect solution once these situations are created. One thing is for sure, the children had no part in creating this situation and they are ALWAYS the ones who are most adversely affected.

All you do by going with this law is make an already hard world for divorced men, much more difficult.

All the more reason why the choice to marry and whom to marry is likely the most important decision you will ever make, second only to having children.

[SqDancerLynn1]

I say he should sue the biolgical father to cover the child support

[hybrid]

Originally Posted by BusaDave

Hmmm...

...aren't there MEN involved in your scenario?

That view is a bit myopic, and appears on the surface to be a bit sexist in that you seem to be totally discounting the contribution of womens' roles in nurturing children. That aside, the issue is that the laws are focused (or should be focused) on what's best for the CHILDREN in these situations. There will be no perfect solution once these situations are created. One thing is for sure, the children had no part in creating this situation and they are ALWAYS the ones who are most adversely affected.


All the more reason why the choice to marry and whom to marry is likely the most important decision you will ever make, second only to having children.

How is my view point myopic?

You mean to tell me that its more short sighted to think that men should have some kind of measures to protect them? Arent you in the stone age with that kind of thinking?

How can you justify any of what happened to this guy?

[HUTSCBR]

If it is not your offspring and you chose not to support said child then that should be it. Is it the guys fault he was deceived and lied to by a whore? Why should he be punished? The best interest of the child you say? Is it the best interest in the child that you found out his mother fucked another guy and deceived you, now you hold resentment towards the child b/c of her? That sounds like a good idea. Set your own personal morals to the side and put yourself in the situation. Could you honestly say you would gladly give away part of you paycheck to something you had nothing to do with? What about the childs boi father? Hello...isn't that covered in the law. You conceived, you are responsible. It is unfortunate for the child, but don't make the guy pay for his mothers mistakes.

[Rascus]

Originally Posted by BusaDave

Hmmm...

...aren't there MEN involved in your scenario?

Men aren't the one's lying, they are being lied to, deceived on the agenda of the women. How is that in the best interest of the child?

That view is a bit myopic, and appears on the surface to be a bit sexist in that you seem to be totally discounting the contribution of womens' roles in nurturing children. That aside, the issue is that the laws are focused (or should be focused) on what's best for the CHILDREN in these situations. There will be no perfect solution once these situations are created. One thing is for sure, the children had no part in creating this situation and they are ALWAYS the ones who are most adversely affected.

Again, had the women been HONEST at the beginning of this scenario and wasn't selfish you wouldn't have to worry about affecting the child. I don't see how women could morally sit there and just "pick" a dad for her kid if she has been with say 3 different guys during the time of conception.

That's not fair to anyone. And because the women made that decision the guy has to go through hell and high water to try and rectify it.

[BusaDave]

Originally Posted by hybrid

How can you justify any of what happened to this guy?

I'm not trying to justify what happened to this guy. I am addressing the whole "women are whores" attitude you directly stated, along with the "she gets to stay home and fuck me out of money" attitude.

I am addressing the generic "should genetic testing be mandatory" question.

If you want the kind of relationship based on mistrust of your wife in order to assure that you are the father, then by all means, knock yourself out. My suggestion would be to put this in a prenuptual agreement rather than pop it after marrying and having a child.

Aren't you one of the "keep the government out of my business" crowd?

[BusaDave]

Originally Posted by Rascus

Men aren't the one's lying, they are being lied to, deceived on the agenda of the women. How is that in the best interest of the child?

You don't really mean to imply that women have not suffered at the lies and agendas of men, do you?

The best interest of the child is to be determined by a court in the absence of a "normal" household. The fact that women prevail in custody suits has as much to do with real-life parental roles as it does with any kind of conspiracy. Most of the laws you are complaining about were established by and are enforced by a legal and political system dominated primarily by men.

Are there injustices? Sure, and they should be minimized. The presumption of fatherhood based upon marriage and lack of paternal challenge, is based upon the concept of marriage as a trust relationship. Using the scenario of financial and emotional support of a child for three or more years, the presumption on everyones' part is the father is the husband. Once this presumption is incorrect, the "best interest" of the child has to be determined by a court. Their job is to minimize the fallout of adult decisions on the life of the child whether at the expense of the adults or not.

[hybrid]

Originally Posted by BusaDave

I'm not trying to justify what happened to this guy. I am addressing the whole "women are whores" attitude you directly stated, along with the "she gets to stay home and fuck me out of money" attitude

Oh but Dave.........it does happen way too often. And believe me I am not jaded on the subject. My paternal father left my mother with four kids and not a dime...........

You can seriously think its alright to put one adult in the poor house while the other is fine because that one has custody. When parents divorce the cost should be split straight down the middle and I aint talking about the house. Housing should be addressed but it should be equal in that respect as well.

Originally Posted by BusaDave

I am addressing the generic "should genetic testing be mandatory" question.

Notice I didnt vote........I dont think that testing should be mandatory but I sure as hell dont think there should be a time limit on it either. In fact I think the woman should be liable if found to have decieved the "father"

Originally Posted by BusaDave

If you want the kind of relationship based on mistrust of your wife in order to assure that you are the father, then by all means, knock yourself out. My suggestion would be to put this in a prenuptual agreement rather than pop it after marrying and having a child.

Well seeing how the government is fucking this one up..........Im going to assume that I need to do something like this or just not have any damn kids like I planned already.

Ori