Dating a woman with kids

blurbro · 06-05-2005, 05:12 AM

Anybody out there have any experience with this. Is it wrong of me to assume that most women with kids are on average a little bit more clingy that than others. That’s just what I think. Don’t know. Don’t think I’m against getting in a relationship with them but it just makes sense to me to be a little most cautious. Make sure that they want you for you and not just to have somebody, anybody. Oh and if the kids are brats, forget it.
I’ve got this buddy that is dating a woman with kids. I know for a fact that she is very clingy. She doesn’t give him an inch of slack and needs him around all the time. I’d be running for the hills. Not sure if it’s about love or just to has a warm body around. Problem is I’m not all that sure that he is into her. He hasn’t been his normal happy self since he started dating her. Plus one time a month ago, while I was around, she called him to complain that he was starting to get distant. Needless to say, since that call he has spent every waking, non-working minute with her. He is also the kind of guy that likes to be with someone just to have them around. That and he is a nice guy that doesn’t like to hurt people. Plus he likes kids. So I can’t tell if he feels sorry for her, the kids, or himself because he sure as heck isn’t in it for love.
Now, none of this is my business and I don’t intend to make it may business unless he buys a ring. Then I may ask him if he knows what he’s doing. Funny. A week or two after they started dating I teased him by saying that she’d say yes right now if he’d offer to marry her. Actually floored me when he said “I know she would” and he wasn’t happy about it.
So I’m pretty sure the only way this relationship will brake up is if he does it. Don’t think he has ever been the dumper in his life. But like I said, none of my business. If he buys a ring, I may have to do a little picking of his brain. I am a friend and would hate to see him make a mistake. I could be wrong, they may both be in love. If so, the sign are miss leading.
Anyway, I’m interesting in know what kind of experience anyone’s had with women with kids. Is it safe to assume you should approach with caution or am I wrong.

Rascus · 06-05-2005, 05:24 AM

I've never dated a woman with kids, however, I would always go by one rule. Never meet the kids until you are sure that the relationship is going somewhere. No sense to confuse the kids and further then they may already be with mommy and daddy splitting up. Now mommy has some guy coming over and seeing him once or twice while he is gone.

This may sound chauvenist but I would think the clingy part is that the women would want a man around the house to help out, father figure for the kid, etc. They may be looking for something to fill the void. Can't really say this happens with guys because 9 times out of 10 the mother gets the kids.

badgixxer · 06-05-2005, 05:54 AM

i've dated a few single moms - no biggie - every person is different....
just need to be a little more respectful of her space and what she says in relation to the kids....i didn't find any of the single moms i dated to be any different from any other women i've dated....
they are all needy as hell

j/k girls don't start flaming...

4real · 06-05-2005, 07:13 AM

i've done it and it is diffrent you have to take in consideration the kid, no way around it and to be honest it was a cool experince i like the little guy and even though it did not work between me and his mom i still check on him from time to time

f2benny · 06-05-2005, 07:57 AM

First, only the worst trashy woman will introduce you to her children before you are in a long term committed relationship. The preservation of the family dynamic will be the most important thing for a woman of decent values. Keep that in mind. Second, remember they are single for a reason. Could be the man was a problem, but not always.

Chinygyal · 06-05-2005, 08:10 AM

I agree with Rascus & f2benny, I am a mom and I would NEVER introduce my kids to any man unless I was 100% sure that we were going further than just dating (before I got married). A lot of times the guy never even knew where I lived. I was the one who would go out and do my business on the street, not bring my business into the home.

ASCI_Blue · 06-05-2005, 11:39 AM

I've dated two women with kids and neither of them was overly clingy. Matter of fact the exact opposite. The first I'm still friends with. The second was a fucking nut and I'm best off without her.

TRaGiK · 06-05-2005, 01:53 PM

I'd have no problem dating a women with kids, as long as they're not looking for a daddy. I've got a kid myself, so why not?

bumblebee · 06-05-2005, 08:18 PM

I have found most women with kids are more cautious, not clingy. Only advice I would give...Be upfront and honest at all times in all things...Her life is difficult enough trying to support and raise kid/s without head games or complications from you. If your intention is friendship and sex...be upfront still...she just might surprise you...

blurbro · 06-05-2005, 08:51 PM

I guess I based what I thought on that most guys would try to stay away from women with kids. Thought that it used to be this way. Maybe it isn't so much anymore. Could be an age group thing. In the college age group this maybe true. I'm 27 now and the age group I'm in doesn't seem to care as much. Guess the older you get it becomes more of a fact of life you have to/learn to deal with.

wangsta · 06-05-2005, 08:55 PM

Good thing is that atleast you know they like to screw just wear your jimmy hat.

TRaGiK · 06-05-2005, 09:36 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by wangsta

Good thing is that atleast you know they like to screw just wear your jimmy hat.

Here we go....

beowulf2k · 06-06-2005, 03:52 AM

You didn't specify how many kids. My friend is dating a gal with 4 kids...all boys at that. Seems good so far, but lets wait and see.
I noticed dating women with boys is much harder than dating women with girls. One time I went on a date with a girl that had two boys and in the middle of the meal one kid went ballistic and started throwing food on the floor, when his mom couldnt control him I simply asked her if she wanted to leave, at that time the kid positions to throw food at me, I then said "boy don't do that or I will snatch you from your seat and whoop ya".
Well he chunked mashed taters (missed by the way) I stood up, reach over the table, snagged his ass from the chair (pulled him over the table and food), took him outside and 2 wails on the behind. He came in running to mommy crying, but straightend up after that. Since then I havent seen the girl, but we talk on occasion and she said her "kid" is taking rittalin.
Kid needs some discipline, not drugs.

bumblebee · 06-06-2005, 08:19 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by beowulf2k

Kid needs some discipline, not drugs.

...

badgixxer · 06-06-2005, 08:22 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by beowulf2k

Kid needs some discipline, not drugs.

preach-on.... kids today or maybe it's the parents, don't have a clue....