Parents and the Guilt Trip

[ClovedBoss]

So I was thinking of making a questioneer of sorts after my latest discussion with my parents about owning a sports bike. Im wondering how bad or if bad you guys had to hear it and feal like sh't because of owning/wanting to own a sportsbike. I am literally getting a huge guilt trip and it pisses me off and makes me feal like im going to die if I get a bike (mind you I have grown up knowing how to ride and am a good beginner rider w/ out there knowledge). Im guessing this is common....or is it? lol
So let me know what you had to go through on your first sportsbike with your parents opinions.

[Ozy]

Leave home! then do whatever the fark you want.

[Its Sparks]

Put a guilt trip on them..tell them its a lifelong dream of yours and ask them if they really want to crush your dreams *tear*.

Works every time.

[ClovedBoss]

Originally Posted by Its Sparks

Put a guilt trip on them..tell them its a lifelong dream of yours and ask them if they really want to crush your dreams *tear*.

Works every time.

Lol you dont know my dad...

[Ryaan]

Try to show him how good gear is, and tell him (show) the MSF Courses that you can take..

[donkeyman]

I told them I was going to ride. I broke them in by saying I'm just going to take the MSF course to see if I liked it or not. Then after I took the course, I told them hey, biking is fun. Look at all the safe stuff they thought me. It was really helpful. If I can find a good "small" starter bike, I will buy it and ride around my neighbourhood for a bit. I will buy all the gear from head to toe and ride safe.

Then after you get the starter bike and stay alive for a bit, then you say you found another great bike at a good price and you're buying it. It might be a "little" bit faster, but not that much more.

It worked for me. Now I have a nice bike. There was not too much guilt trip from my family, but you can sense it there, but they knew I'm going to do whatever I wanted. But I gave them some credit for helping me make the right decisions anyway.

[paul1149]

You didn't state your age, but maybe you can negotiate with your parents. Give to get. Go with a small bike to start, give away night riding, riding on freeways, riding with in packs with crazy people (always a good thing to avoid). Then as you earn their trust in time you can renegotiate and step up. That is, if you're responsible and they're reasonable.
p.

[ClovedBoss]

Thanks for the reply's so far but I think it might go off course. I dont actually have to convince them in any way and dont have to listen to what they say because I dont live with them and im 21. I just respect what they have to say. I just wanted to hear other story's like the one posted two up from mine. Sorry for the misleading if any. I have told them im taking the course though.

[mssdrider]

*shrug*
"if you EVER get a bike we're going to disown you! i cant believe you would be so selfish as to think only of your own pleasure and not about the sleepless nights and worries that you would put us through! " insert tears and yelling and screaming here (from them)

now it's "if you HAVE to ride, take it to the track."

took then 3+ years though...

[OreoGaborio]

You're 21... That means you're an adult, but if you're not in a position to move out that means you're also young enough to get shit from your parents & let them have a say what you can & can't do & you should respect that... Above all that also means you're also young enough to have PLENTY of riding years ahead of you. There's NO RUSH.

Long story short, I wanted to get a bike when i was in HS & asked my dad if I could buy one with my own money... His response: "Not while you're living in MY FUKING House". And I respected that.

6-7 years later in 2004, even though I had moved back home after College, I earned my parent's respect enough for them to allow me to buy one with my own money. They didn't condone it, but they were aware of the fact that I took MSF a few years before & had introduced myself to the world of motorcycles in the safest way possible and would continue with that kind of approach.

My advice:
If you're gonna do the course, just do it.
DON'T NAG... Don't constantly bring up the subject of motorcycles but do educate them out about the Motorcycle Safety Foundation beginner and advanced rider courses. Just get a brochure & leave it out somewhere or something.
Above all, prove to them that you're a safe & responsible person every day in everything you do. NOTHING you say will prove that, you have to do it with your actions.

Remember... No rush.

[leland]

Here is how it worked for me. My dad is one of the calmest people I know. He is a lot like me and doesn't like to speak a lot. So he usually doesn't speak unless asking us how we are. Or at least thats all he usually ask me lol. When I first asked I think he believed I was joking. So I asked again and once again he didn't really answer me. The third time I asked was the first time I ever saw him mad and yelled at me and told me if I wanted one wait till I was in my 20s to see if I still wanted one.

I finally talked him into letting me take the msf course. Once I did that and I got my license he then allowed me to get my first bike. But this was only after I got eagle scout because we made a deal that once I got eagle I could get a bike. The best way to win your parents over is maturity and responsibility.

[ClovedBoss]

Originally Posted by OreoGaborio

My advice:
If you're gonna do the course, just do it.
DON'T NAG... Don't constantly bring up the subject of motorcycles but do educate them out about the Motorcycle Safety Foundation beginner and advanced rider courses. Just get a brochure & leave it out somewhere or something.
Above all, prove to them that you're a safe & responsible person every day in everything you do. NOTHING you say will prove that, you have to do it with your actions.

Remember... No rush.

Agreed. Thanks for the comment.

[kevin_stevens]

Tell them to take out a big life insurance policy on you and make it a win-win.

KeS

[Scootimus]

My dad got me started riding dirt bike when I was 11 or 12. I owned one until I was almost 17. Then I moved in with a friends parents to finish high school.....GO KNIGHTS! After I graduated I bought an Interceptor 500 and rode it for a few months. Mom wasn't too crazy about the idea but she didn't freak out. My older brother owned street bikes from age 17 to 26 and there were countless times my dad would have to go pick him up for dui. Fortunately, they knew that wasn't my thing. It's all about how responsible you are. Take the course and let them know how excited you are about it.

[OldSchlPunk]

Try showing them the research you're doing (you ARE doing your research here aren't you?) to become a safe responsible rider. Show them the stickies in this forum.

It may take a while, but when they do give their approval make sure you:
Do the MSF. After the MSF, practice as often as possible in an empty parking lot. That info needs to be second nature when you ride in traffic.

Start small. A 250 Ninja can be a lot of fun while getting the parents used to the idea of your riding.

ALWAYS WEAR YOUR GEAR! That can't be emphasized enough. Good gear can be a lifesaver. Nobody intends on wrecking, but if it does you need to be as protected as possible.


Riding can be a lot of fun. It does have it's own set of inherent dangers, but so do other things in life. There are many things you can do to minimize those dangers.

My dad didn't hesitate when I bought my first bike in high school at age 18. He told me he always trusted I'd do the right thing. He even helped talk my mom into it. I didn't let him down.

My mom was never completely comfortable with my riding, but she knew I was responsible and saw how far I went to be a good rider, a safe rider.

Good luck winning your parents over.