Convincing Parents

[invictator]

I've recently been interested in getting my first bike. As I'm a college student, I still live under my parents house and what they say, goes. I'm 20 and will be 21 in two weeks and I know I can get the bike if I want, but I'd really feel a lot better if I first had my parents approval... I'm guessing some of you have been in this situation before and I'd appreciate some feedback..

I've tried to tell them everything I could but they won't hear it... To quote acalliste from a different thread:

It can be dangerous, but it's a calculated risk.

It's more dangerous if you don't take precautions to reduce the risk (always wear you gear, get training, learn proper riding techniques, don't start on a bike that will hinder your learning curve, etc).

If you do everything you are supposed to do, correctly, all the time, the danger is still there. But you've given yourself a much better chance of survival than of you didn't do these things.

That said, if you want to make sure you are always safe and out of harms way, then you are going to have a very dull life. Life is for living.

Also, my older brother had a bike a few years back (GSXR 750). They still didn't want him to get one either, but that didn't really stop him...

[OCStyle]

well what can I say? welcome to my nightmare. Im 20, will be 21 in 2 weeks and 1 day. My parents know I've wanted to ride since 3d grade; I kept telling them it would happen sooner or later. I took msf when I was 16, "just for fun" I told them. Finally, got my license and started riding my friends' bikes a couple months ago.

Granted I don't live with them, they do, however pay for my rent. They threatened to cut me off, so I got a job. It was a bluff, and I made the right call. Show responsibility and persitence. As much as no parent wants to see their child mangled in some horrible wreck, sooner or later they will get the point and realize they cannot stop you from doing something you love. (Took me the better part of 12 years, but its working). Goodluck.

[Anthonyd5189]

Well...My situation was way different than yours because Im not 18 yet.

I just asked if I could take the class and I did...then after about a month after the class I started to look at bikes, then brought my dad along. Then finally he decided it would be a good way for me to learn money managment. Plus he couldn't say I'm too young because he had a motorcycle when he was 17.

[F&D]

You might just have to accept that they may NEVER accept you riding. I'm almost 41 freaking years old and haven't lived under my parents roof for 22 years, but my mother still has anxiety attacks over me riding a motorcycle. So you may not be able to convince them of anything.

That said, their roof, their rules. Even once you're over 18, if they don't want you riding and you're living under their roof (or they're otherwise paying your living expenses), then that's that.

[Moon]

Originally Posted by invictator

I've recently been interested in getting my first bike. As I'm a college student, I still live under my parents house and what they say, goes. I'm 20 and will be 21 in two weeks and I know I can get the bike if I want, but I'd really feel a lot better if I first had my parents approval... I'm guessing some of you have been in this situation before and I'd appreciate some feedback..

.

All interrelated
1) Grades: keep um up there
2) Restraint: make the right decisions and demonstrate them. Training, gear, logical selection of first bike.
3) Responsibility: Work for it, riding behaviour, (prev info)
4) Give them logical arguments, fuel economy, gear and safe habits etc etc etc

[RayOSV]

All good advice above. If you haven't taken the msf course yet, see if one of your parents will take it with you. At least have them come watch some of the range drills. It all looks pretty tame.

Keep up your grades, keep up the dialogue, figure out how you'll pay for bike/gear/insurance, and show responsibility.

[ghost_a*]

i did it without my mom's blessing.

my dad passed away when i was 15, so he obviously didn't need convincing.
i got mine when i was 24 though.
obviously didn't live at home, but i still wanted my mom's blessing cause i'm a total momma's boy.
i told her that i was gonna get one, she said she can't stop me, but she wouldn't give me her blessing.
i did it anyways.

she's gotten used to it.
still never likes to talk about it.

my advice. do what makes you happy.
yes, they're your parents and you want to make them proud and please them, but there are a few certain things in my life that i'm not willing to compromise on, and a sportbike is one of 'em.
so in the end, again, do what makes YOU happy.

[Jehos]

I'm going to take the contrarian view, if you're not old enough to pay your own rent, you're not old enough to be riding a motorcycle.

[06CBR1Ltr]

Originally Posted by Jehos

I'm going to take the contrarian view, if you're not old enough to pay your own rent, you're not old enough to be riding a motorcycle.

Oh come on now! That's quite the general statement. I had my 1st bike at the age of well I'm so old now I can't remember exactly, but it was b/w 10 and 12. And I started riding on the streets as soon as I had my drivers license.

I know everyone's family is different but to say what you said really doesn't apply.

[Libertine]

Hey man,

I can't say i'm in the same situation as you, but I can maybe give you some advice on how to ease the tension a little. I'm also 20, 21 in June, and I just started riding. My situation differs in that my dad had 3 bikes sitting in the garage when I was 10....my first dirtbike was one he bought for me in pieces and the condition was that I had to build it if I wanted to ride it

That being said, my mother was pretty freaked about me riding. The best I could do to get her to relax was lay out a PLAN that she could look at which demonstrated how carefully I was going about it. Taking the course, not riding in traffic for the first few months of riding, a few other things eased her mind a bit and made it easier to get over her objections.

Don't just tell them you want one, explain to them in detail -why- you want one and -why- you feel you can be one of those riders that is only at reasonable risk.

Best of luck!

[Jonny Thrice]

I'm 28, been living on my own for a few years now...and yeah, I'm a little scared to tell my parents, as crazy as that sounds.

Mostly because I went thru this a few years ago, and my father looked into my eyes and said "Please...for me...dont get a bike". I dunno...that kinda killed it for me : (also cause I failed my test at the time, and was too busy with other things to try again).

Now I'm a little older and wiser...and I'm going to have to sit him down and just tell him I'm getting a bike. I have safety as my priority #1, and I'm going to point that out to him.

[MattR302]

kinda same situation for me. Summer/Fall of 05 i had 2 friends get their M licenses, and one got a harley shortly after, the other got an F4 in march. So over the winter I casually mentioned 2 or 3 times how maybe i'd get a motorcycle so i could ride with them. Mom was like "nah i dont think so."

Well last may i was finishing up my 2nd to last semester at UConn. I had a week after finals before I had to move out of my apartment there. I took the MSF course that week without parents knowing, and stopped by the DMV to get the endorsement on the way to move back home. That was a friday.

2 days later, that sunday moning, I went out with those 2 guys. One had a blazer, the other had a trailer. Picked up the Ninja 500 from my roommate's brother's house, and brought it home. Parked it in the driveway. Went inside, was like "mom, dad, could you come outside for a minute?" and my mom was like "did you get me a mother's day present?" and i was like "kinda" as i showed it to them.

Mom had a "oh my gosh i hope thats not yours" look on her face and turned to the other 2 guys and was like "this is yours right?". Dad had a look on his face like "hey, thats kinda neat" but didnt say anything. That's when i pulled out my wallet, and was like "Mom, it's ok, the state says i can ride it, I've got the motorcycle license" and told her that i took the motorcycle driver's ed (MSF) to be safe, and how it was cheap and not powerful so its a good bike for beginners.
Mom: "you'll need to pay your own insurance" to discourage me.
Me: "Joe's bike (F4) is only like $600 a year, mine should be about half that".
Mom: "You need to wear a helmet when you ride it!!"
Me: "well mom you were asking me if i wanted anything for my birthday last week, you can get me a helmet if you want."
Mom: "I'll buy you whatever you need to be safe!"

So later that evening we went out to eat for Mother's day. She said "you know, once you told me to come outside, i kinda knew you got a motorcycle, because you had mentioned it a few months ago." Dad never said anything for it or against it, but he's took it out around the block a handful of times.

So thats how it went for me. She still doesnt completely like it and worries, and always tells me to be careful when i take it out. But I told her i took the MSF to be safe, and bought the gear to be safe, so that reassured her. I knew theyd never give me the "you have to get rid of it or you have to move out" alternative.

But yeah, like moon said: Keep your grades up, show them you're responsible, buy gear, stay out of trouble and dont get speeding tickets, help out around the house, etc. Good luck.

[Shawn3210]

I STILL need to find a way to tell my family lol. They HATE motorcycle, so does my gf family because some relative died on one.

[MotorcycleFreak413]

Hey, I know this is very long (all my posts are long) but you and everybody else, please read.

I feel your pain too man. I'm 14 and I will be 15 tomorrow. I love bikes and I have loved them my whole life and I always will and nobody can ever stop me from loving them and wanting one, NOT EVEN MY PARENTS! But anyways, yes, listen to the advice everybody else is giving. And I ALWAYS try to give my parents logical reasons, such as I will be saving more gas than this family has ever saved, (they want to get me a new car when my time comes) but we will be spending A LOT less than a car, etc.

And have your parents ever stopped you from doing or loving or wanting what you want? I've been playing basketball since I could walk and I used to be VERY good at basketball (and when I say VERY GOOD, I mean it). I used to play all the time, every day, rain or snow or wind or whatever! I dreamed of being in the NBA and becoming a professional basketball player because I was so good. But my parents only wanted me to become a doctor, and they never really cared about my dream of being an NBA player. So when I started high school, my dad told me: "Okay, you will never be able to play in the nba and you will never become a basketball player" And he said a lot of things, MEAN things, that put me down so a few years later (now), I really suck at basketball and I wont become a basketball player and I will be a doctor.

There have been many things in life that I have always loved and/or always wanted but my parents have always been there to stop me from it. But MOTORCYCLES is one thing that I am CERTAIN my parents can never stop me from.

So just continue what you're doing man, and follow everybody's advice. I hope your parents let you get your motorcycle. God bless dude.

peace.

[Endorphine]

Don't know what to tell you man, if they don't want you to get a bike, they're just looking out for your safety, i live with my mom and she didn't have a single problem with it, i'm loved bikes since i was little, i had a BMW sportbike transformer that started it all for me when i was like 6, then at like 12-14, i really started falling in love with bikes, told my mom that one day i'd have a bike, she said aslong as you stay safe, so right when i had the money, i bought my gixxy =D