Skippy’s List » Skippy’s List: The 213 things Skippy is no longer allowed to do in the U.S. Army
some highlights:
Quote:
10. Not allowed to purchase anyone’s soul on government time.
33. Not allowed to chew gum at formation, unless I brought enough for everybody.
34. (Next day) Not allowed to chew gum at formation even if I *did* bring enough for everybody.
72. May not wear gimp mask while on duty.
100. Claymore mines are not filled with yummy candy, and it is wrong to tell new soldiers that they are.
129. The Microsoft ® “Dancing Paperclip” is not authorized to countermand any orders.
184. When operating a military vehicle I may *not* attempt something “I saw in a cartoon”.
213. Do not convince NCO’s that their razorbumps are the result of microscopic parasites.
And my favorite- 87. If the thought of something makes me giggle for longer than 15 seconds, I am to assume that I am not allowed to do it.